Communicating about kink

One issue I had for years is not communicating in the best way with my wife. Much of the issue was being afraid to just bring up the topic or "how to bring up the topic'. So I would beat around the bush till she was frustrated with me and didn't want to talk about it or I would just not say anything and hope for the best.

I still have the problem of getting online, reading stories, forums, post, blogs and hearing others having such "great success" with something or the wife "loving it so much". I will run out and buy the item or product without really letting my big brain do the thinking.

I have blogged before about a clear penis sleeve that I heard was so "good" and so many just "loved". I went out and bought it, showed it to my wife and she didn't just "turn me down" but she sure wasn't all warm and fuzzy like the forum post talked about. So off we go with me trying it with not much success the first time which I wrote off as inexperience with the toy. Second time we got the chance to use it, things worked out much better, and it was a very interesting event. I couldn't feel a thing, yet I was worked up so much. I couldn't read my wife and tell what she thought about it. After a bit we decided to pull it off and let me finish off. I had time to think about it and read more.

I figured with the second try and we actually trying some positions with it, I would find out what she thought of it. After a few cocktails the other night I decided it was the perfect time because she will be the most honest she would be. Some forum post talk of the wife liking the sleeve so much because it was much bigger and was afraid to be honest with the husband - fearing he would feel bad about his penis size. So I asked her what she thought about the sleeve and decided if she liked it, it would become a regular part and if she didn't, it wouldn't be used again.

She started off by saying she wasn't sure if she really wanted to tell me about how she felt and if I wanted to use it, she was ok with it. I had to pull it out of her and was surprised at the answer. With the way she was talking I was expecting to hear her loving the sleeve and it did more for her than I did. But that didn't happen, she actually said that because of my size and the thickness of the sleeve it was "too big" and she didn't enjoy it. I was a bit surprised when she told me and would rather me put something much thinner on if I wanted to have less stimulation because it was very uncomfortable.

I quickly assured her it was, as always, a idea that I wanted to try and would not be used again. I wanted to experience sex with my wife without any stimulation to myself because I just don't have the ability to hold off that long after being in chastity. So with her blessing I am looking for something that is thicker than a condom but not too thick. That way, she can tease me as she loves to do by playing with my nipples as we have intercourse and I can continue to "go" longer. She knows my hopes are to be so worked up I orgasm even with the simulation to my penis not being there. Yes...another forum post..lol

The search goes on. Trying to think and find anything much thinner.