My view of chastity and what it means to me has changed drastically. I have found clear picture of my interest and what they mean.
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I would masturbate, dream up a fantasy, masturbate, bigger fantasy, masturbate, attempt to be sexual with you and "want" the fantasy. Masturbating so much I had dulled my mind with the fantasies.
Anytime I was around you I was thinking of sex and the chance to have sex. So if touched, rubbed, flirted with I thought it was a advance for sex. I would grope and advance with negative results and pushing you further away without knowing about it.
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With chastity it took all that way. I don't see a fetish lifestyle. I see chastity as a extension of my devotion and love to you. I see it bringing us closer together, more intimate, and you more comfortable to flirt and tease without worries of advances on unsolicited sexual advances.
My mind cleared up and my focus on you more than ever. Not masturbating, cut out the need for fetish fantasies. I now find myself looking at ways to bring you to a greater orgasm and make your sexual experience better.
Anytime I am around you I am still sexually energized, but with the chastity and knowing it is not the scheduled release date, I enjoy your advances and return loving affection without you having to worry.
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I hope in time that we will continue to grow closer and rebuild the bonds between us that I so fractured over the years.
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