Saturday, April 4, 2015
The joy of knowing.
There is such a joy and peace in knowing that I do not have access to my orgasm, when I am first locked up. The first week, I find myself so happy/excited that I don't have any control. It was such a normal night for me to get ready for bed, find a good blog and release myself. Once the device is on, that doesn't happen. I will get ready for bed, smile a bit, tap on the device and roll over for a night of sleep.
I do not really understand the reason I enjoy it so much because I am not really submissive by nature and I don't feel it as much as a submissive act as others. It is giving up control in any view, yes I agree and I am quite happy to give up that control to my wife. Even tho she doesn't look to take that control and use it in any way.
It does connect me a bit more with her, mainly because I can't be selfish and enjoy a quick orgasm without the need for her. After many years of marriage it was much easier for me to just get a "quickie" in the bathroom and crash for the night than fight the idea of getting the kids to bed, waiting up late to make sure they were asleep and then trying to get in the mood.
However, with the device, I am in the mood the whole time and look forward to that night where we stay up late and slip under the covers. So when I see ACCESS DENIED... I smile a bit....