Difference in wanting chastity and being in chastity.

I will say this, in the early years when I was still trying to find a device that worked right I "needed" attention to be happy in chastity. I would get frustrated about being in the chastity if I wasn't getting any attention I wanted out. Much of the problem was the ill fitting devices and the device would become either painful or UN-wearable after a week or so. This put a lot of pressure on my wife to "pay attention" to me.

The whole point of the chastity was for her not to have to do anything and when she was "in the mood" she could then pay attention. Plus the fact that I could escape from the devices did not add to the experience in a good way.

I was "wanting chastity" but not getting it because I could escape, and couldn't wear the device comfortably for very long. Frustration would set in my wife and she just wouldn't want to continue, nor would I after a while. Then a few weeks would go by, the fetish itch would be so great I would beg for us to try again, I would pick up a new device and try again. Fail again.. "wanting chastity" but not getting it....

We took a long break, ( my wife might have thought it was over ) then I found the Looker 03.... I didn't want to say anything to her about it, I measured, remeasured, remeasured, measured, and then finally ordered. The device came in, fit perfect, yet I wasn't sure to tell her yet... I took the keys and put them under her side of the bed knowing I couldn't access them at night when I would normally masturbate.

I made one month completely with no removal at any point, it was in the summer which with vanilla life our sex life comes to pretty much a halt. We discussed a date night so I removed the device while she was getting ready. We had a wonderful night and the orgasm was fabulous! The next day I sat her down and explained the new device and showed her.

I told her at this time, I believed I could be "in chastity" for once in my life. Since then, the device goes on, we don't speak of it, and I wait... I don't need teasing, the fact that it is on es the pleasure I need. Knowing she has all the keys, she will decide when she is in the mood, and the time isn't set.

All these thinks bring happiness and a comfort to my soul knowing she controls me, owns me, and has all of me.. heart, soul and physically... This is ...... being in chastity....