Saturday, February 23, 2013

Chastity as a way of life.

For so many years and in fact all the years of my marriage I have always wanted to "serve" my wife in many ways but the restraints of her vanilla side has always caused road blocks. Because of this I would always try to shift gears and find a different interest that she might "enjoy" and we could soon be working our way into the lifestyle.

Years went by of this and all it really did was cause more stress in our sex life. Once I found chastity I knew it was the key thing that would give the control to my wife that I wanted to release and would give her the ability to have the control with little effort.

Years of frustration and money dumped into device after device only caused me to get more frustrated about the situation. Finally with the device now I have, I can honestly say I have found a device I can not defeat, nor pull off and can wear as long as required.

My mental state shifts when in my chastity device, I feel I do not have the roller coaster ride of emotions I usually have and my wife even has pointed that out also. With this was one of the many reasons I wanted to go longer term in the device.

I was asked how kinky things are now since I am in chastity and for us it isn't about the "sex" now, it is about a way of life now. I feel better, she likes the results with me and it doesn't change how I treat her yet she does point out that I seem to be taking care of her more than when released. My mind is on her more and I do think of how I can help her when I can. Thus the servant part of me gets to be out.

Much of the stress between us seems to melt away when I am in the chastity device because she also knows that "just a kiss" doesn't turn into me humping her leg wanting sex. She  can cuddle, we can kiss, and she knows I will not advance.When she wants more, she lets me know... And it is all about her now which I enjoy as much as she does.

This comes to the point that a local Dom discussed with me, I could easily end up staying in chastity and wouldn't have a problem long as my wife wanted it. My need is high but my need for her acceptance is higher....


  1. LockenNKept, I understand exactly what , you are saying. What came to mind is this.... 'are we men, really that undisciplined, that we have to be locked in order to have our urges kept under control?" It sure seems as if that is true. The beauty of chastity is that it does remove all power from the male and give it all to the female. Furthermore, the urge to get out, when we can't, further fuels, and fills, our own desires, and ironically satisfies us in some odd and mysterious way.
    Enjoying your blog.

  2. LockedNKept,

    I have just recently discovered your blog and, just tonight, went back and read all your entries from the beginning. How uncanny it is that your situation almost mirrors mine, I mean, completely. Even in the way your keyholder participates and your desires and thoughts. My spouse even unlocked me prior to the holidays last year and we are currently discussing me going back in. You are very good at putting your thoughts into your writings. Where my spouse and I fall short is communication. We just don't talk enough about us at the relationship level plus I am very good at screwing up when it comes to verbalizing my thoughts to her. I am like you in that my fondest hope is for her to fully invest in this lifestyle for us, not just to please me. I can't tell you how frustrating it is that we have been at this for a couple of years and I haven't been able to get her to see the full potential of how good male chastity could be for our relationship if she would just take full control. I really think she still sees it as a game she plays because I want her to. I look forward to reading your future thoughts and experiences.